THE BUSHITE MANIFESTO, A HISTORY IN 3 PARTS

Sunday, November 26, 2006

THE BUSHITE MANIFESTO, A HISTORY IN 3 PARTS
Sunday, November 26, 2006

Have you ever asked yourself; to what does the president owe his great success? Neither have I, for a person to ask such a questions of another, the one of which they speak must actually have had some success, or even one success, or at least have gotten a “B” in Cheerleading, or if having been a cheerleader, must at least have some cleavage to show. The president has none of the above.

The inspiration, perhaps subconsciously, perhaps Rovean, for the twin GW Bush “Victories,” and his adventure in rejoining fascism to greed and voyeurism, was perhaps the most fascinating aspect of his years as president, (for those who, indeed, believing slaughtering, starving, robbing and yet referring constantly to Jesus as his inspiration, can be at all fascinating, even if it is to sane people, a bit maddening.)

The Bush “victories,” I have said, were planned around fascism’s Four reference books, Mein Kampf, 1984 (Orwell), a twisted version of the Old and New Testaments, and the last issue of Looney Tunes and Merry Melodies, in which Porky Pig, Daffy Duck, Elmer Fudd and Bugs Bunny starred, in their Tour-de force’,
A PIG, A DUCK, A DORK AND A BUNNY, GET DOWN AND DIRTY, which his operatives consistently fed the public, but it’s true inspiration he owes to two factors.
(A)-The first is a shortage of good taste, conscience and functional brain cells …and…
(B)-The second is a shortage of good taste, conscience and functional brain cells.

It has been said that Bush’s advisors believed that Hitler did not die in the bunker, but instead, shaved his killer Pit-bull- (named Violet) and dressed it in his Fuhrer costume, shot it and left it for the Allies to think he had shot himself. Then Hitler, disguised as a Baker, got into a Tub with his Butcher and his Candle Stick Maker and rowed across the Atlantic. Later he found himself written up in HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL, the scandal magazine, asking the question, what were 3 men doing in a tub together and at whose apartment? And if so, was it rent-controlled? (The apartment not the tub), and further questioning the sexuality and prudence of Three Men in a Tub, and wondering which would drop the soap first.

When they landed, Hitler went north, the Butcher (Hans Buetcher) went south (and subsequently fell off the planet), and the Candle Stick Maker stayed put in the Tub, so he wouldn’t drip tallow on his toes.

Once safely in America, Hitler disguised himself as a Zookeeper, for the Fox Network.
Later he went through a sex-change operation, gave his name as Hitleretta, became bulimic, lost 75 pounds, died his hair blond, and became a talking headed, bitch-pundit and “author” of a poorly written, badly conceived bit of historical revisionism called, KILL ALL THE LIBERALS (? What is a Liberal anyway?) which after reading left one asking, “What’s wrong with that woman?”, or “Why do some women wear bras, while others wear their ice skates on their heads after dark?”

In her/his first book Hitleretta defends Bush and Joe McCarthy, as heroes maligned by “Liberals” (? what is a Liberal?), Genghis Khan as a true Christian, Caligula s/he says was actually, despite history, a virgin and a mystic, and Nero truly, deep down where the moon doesn't glow, was a misunderstood short-order pizza baker, wanting desperately to be a Big-Time chef in a Roman Sidewalk Bistro-Café’ , and accidentally burned Rome to the ground during an innocent experiment trying out a new BBQ Basting sauce, while BBQing Christians outdoors at the Coliseum.

Meanwhile, the Bushites attacked, with phosphous bombs and then naplam, a day nursery, on Broadway, feeling they were soft on noise-terrorism, initiated by loud-mouthed infants, who kept screeching. They napalmed the nursery for weeks. Then in a dramatic show of the sort of bravado the president displayed when his co-pilot landed his plane on a carrier and Bush elbowed him out of the way to shout, “Mission accomplished,” he rushed into the nursery wildly firing an Uzi as he went, but he was close-lined by a 105 lb. Child care worker, Minnie Finnie, as 12 five year old’s gang tackled and threw up on him. Later petulant and embarrassed, as he was held as a hostage by the toddlers and Minnie Finnie, and they forced him to teach them cheerleading, before they would allow him to wash off the kid-vomit. They freed him only after their demands were met, the White House agreeing, reluctantly, to give them a year’s supply of Puppy Chow for their pets and Hershey Bars for the toddler's as well as a signed autograph of Adam Sandler.

Later, Bush adopted Hitleretta as his son and mentor, but they had a falling-out over the concept of using minced or fresh onions in Macaroni and Cheese-Bush taking the Conservative view and Hitleretta the Liberal.

In the strategy for winning of the faked elections of 2000 & 2004, the Bushites took the following approach, breaking with accepted wisdom about humans, they used a marketing tact, going against Professor Jahni’ Beerschmegle, who believed that mankind was divided into two groups, Hosts and Visitors, the Bushites took the unpopular, avant-garde’ approach that instead, mankind is divided into two groups, males and females, though neither of which realized it, until they were all naked.

Infuriated with the Bushite position, Beerschmegle broke with them and sat in the White House hall on his hat in protest refusing to eat anything but Nougat and figs until the Bushites changed their minds. When the Bushites laughed and hooted at him, he threw warm custard at them, hitting Rove above the left eye and gooking up his glasses.

This led to the infamous, Drug Company fiasco, which we will investigate next week.

Posted by PETE BAGNOLO at 3:07 PM Links to this post


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Have you ever asked yourself; to what does the president owe his great success? Neither have I, for a person to ask such a questions of another, the one of which they speak must actually have had some success, or even one success, or at least have gotten a “B” in Cheerleading, or if having been a cheerleader, must at least have some cleavage to show. The president has none of the above.

The inspiration, perhaps subconsciously, perhaps Rovean, for the twin GW Bush “Victories,” and his adventure in rejoining fascism to greed and voyeurism, was perhaps the most fascinating aspect of his years as president, (for those who, indeed, believing slaughtering, starving, robbing and yet referring constantly to Jesus as his inspiration, can be at all fascinating, even if it is to sane people, a bit maddening.)

The Bush “victories,” I have said, were planned around fascism’s Four reference books, Mein Kampf, 1984 (Orwell), a twisted version of the Old and New Testaments, and the last issue of Looney Tunes and Merry Melodies, in which Porky Pig, Daffy Duck, Elmer Fudd and Bugs Bunny starred, in their Tour-de force’,
A PIG, A DUCK, A DORK AND A BUNNY, GET DOWN AND DIRTY, which his operatives consistently fed the public, but it’s true inspiration he owes to two factors.
(A)-The first is a shortage of good taste, conscience and functional brain cells …and…
(B)-The second is a shortage of good taste, conscience and functional brain cells.

It has been said that Bush’s advisors believed that Hitler did not die in the bunker, but instead, shaved his killer Pit-bull- (named Violet) and dressed it in his Fuhrer costume, shot it and left it for the Allies to think he had shot himself. Then Hitler, disguised as a Baker, got into a Tub with his Butcher and his Candle Stick Maker and rowed across the Atlantic. Later he found himself written up in HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL, the scandal magazine, asking the question, what were 3 men doing in a tub together and at whose apartment? And if so, was it rent-controlled? (The apartment not the tub), and further questioning the sexuality and prudence of Three Men in a Tub, and wondering which would drop the soap first.

When they landed, Hitler went north, the Butcher (Hans Buetcher) went south (and subsequently fell off the planet), and the Candle Stick Maker stayed put in the Tub, so he wouldn’t drip tallow on his toes.

Once safely in America, Hitler disguised himself as a Zookeeper, for the Fox Network.
Later he went through a sex-change operation, gave his name as Hitleretta, became bulimic, lost 75 pounds, died his hair blond, and became a talking headed, bitch-pundit and “author” of a poorly written, badly conceived bit of historical revisionism called, KILL ALL THE LIBERALS (? What is a Liberal anyway?) which after reading left one asking, “What’s wrong with that woman?”, or “Why do some women wear bras, while others wear their ice skates on their heads after dark?”

In her/his first book Hitleretta defends Bush and Joe McCarthy, as heroes maligned by “Liberals” (? what is a Liberal?), Genghis Khan as a true Christian, Caligula s/he says was actually, despite history, a virgin and a mystic, and Nero truly, deep down where the moon doesn't glow, was a misunderstood short-order pizza baker, wanting desperately to be a Big-Time chef in a Roman Sidewalk Bistro-Café’ , and accidentally burned Rome to the ground during an innocent experiment trying out a new BBQ Basting sauce, while BBQing Christians outdoors at the Coliseum.

Meanwhile, the Bushites attacked, with phosphous bombs and then naplam, a day nursery, on Broadway, feeling they were soft on noise-terrorism, initiated by loud-mouthed infants, who kept screeching. They napalmed the nursery for weeks. Then in a dramatic show of the sort of bravado the president displayed when his co-pilot landed his plane on a carrier and Bush elbowed him out of the way to shout, “Mission accomplished,” he rushed into the nursery wildly firing an Uzi as he went, but he was close-lined by a 105 lb. Child care worker, Minnie Finnie, as 12 five year old’s gang tackled and threw up on him. Later petulant and embarrassed, as he was held as a hostage by the toddlers and Minnie Finnie, and they forced him to teach them cheerleading, before they would allow him to wash off the kid-vomit. They freed him only after their demands were met, the White House agreeing, reluctantly, to give them a year’s supply of Puppy Chow for their pets and Hershey Bars for the toddler's as well as a signed autograph of Adam Sandler.

Later, Bush adopted Hitleretta as his son and mentor, but they had a falling-out over the concept of using minced or fresh onions in Macaroni and Cheese-Bush taking the Conservative view and Hitleretta the Liberal.

In the strategy for winning of the faked elections of 2000 & 2004, the Bushites took the following approach, breaking with accepted wisdom about humans, they used a marketing tact, going against Professor Jahni’ Beerschmegle, who believed that mankind was divided into two groups, Hosts and Visitors, the Bushites took the unpopular, avant-garde’ approach that instead, mankind is divided into two groups, males and females, though neither of which realized it, until they were all naked.

Infuriated with the Bushite position, Beerschmegle broke with them and sat in the White House hall on his hat in protest refusing to eat anything but Nougat and figs until the Bushites changed their minds. When the Bushites laughed and hooted at him, he threw warm custard at them, hitting Rove above the left eye and gooking up his glasses.

This led to the infamous, Drug Company fiasco, which we will investigate next week.

Posted by PETE BAGNOLO at 3:07 PM Links to this post



Nov 29, 2006 Nov 21, 2006 Home
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